Kids Going "Off the Derech" - Reasons, Reactions, and Responses

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Published Sep 17, 2024

Rabbi Y.Y. Jacobson

Just as many young people who are not religious become Orthodox, so do many young Orthodox Jews leave Orthodox practice behind. Colloquially, this is often called being “off the derech” - that is, off “the” way of traditional Torah practice.

The phenomenon of Orthodox Jews becoming less classically religious is real, and it’s important to think about why it happens. Is it simply a question of disbelief or doubt regarding dogma? Are there other reasons that we, as parents and educators, should take into account? In what ways are our educational methods to blame, how can we work to reform those problems, and can we fix the well-meaning but mistaken messages that may have been imparted to our children? What can we learn from those who leave Orthodoxy, and do we have a responsibility to try to convince them to come back? How can parents of children who are not shomrei Shabbat avoid the sense of failure, or a belief that their kids have rejected them and everything that they believe? On the other hand, if children seem well-rooted in an Orthodox belief system, is there any reason for concern when they attend secular college or the Israeli army?

In order to address these questions, Scott was honored to speak to Rabbi Y.Y. Jacobson on this episode of the Orthodox Conundrum Podcast.
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